Golf is a good walk spoiled. ~Mark Twain
Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's. ~Grantland Rice
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson
Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. ~Author Unknown
The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. ~P.J. O'Rourke
It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification. ~Bruce McCall
Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~Sam Snead
What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive. ~Arnold Palmer
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
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