A golf course is nothing but a poolroom moved outdoors

Golf Quotes

A golf course is nothing but a poolroom moved outdoors. ~Barry Fitzgerald, Going My Way


I can airmail the golf ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it. ~Jim Dent


It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot. ~Nubar Gulbenkian, 1972


Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses. ~Adlai Stevenson


I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose. ~Gerald Ford


The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez



I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105. ~Bob Hope


After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez, on his Puerto Rican accent


My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch. ~Lee Trevino


Playing the game I have learned the meaning of humility. It has given me an understanding of futility of the human effort. ~Abba Eban


It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. ~Hank Aaron, 1971


Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry Garcia. The ball changes everything. ~Michael Bamberger

from : http://www.quotegarden.com

The average golfer doesn't play golf

Golf Quotes

The average golfer doesn't play golf. He attacks it. ~Jack Burke


The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil. ~Author Unknown


One under a tree, one under a bush, one under the water. ~Lee Trevino, describing how he was one under during a tournament


Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. ~Tiger Woods


The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows. ~P.G. Wodehouse


It's so bad I could putt off a tabletop and still leave the ball halfway down the leg. ~J.C. Snead, on his putting


Any game where a man 60 can beat a man 30 ain't no game. ~Burt Shotten


There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~Lee Trevino


Golf is not just an exercise; it's an adventure, a romance... a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined. ~Harold Segall


The worst club in my bag is my brain. ~Chris Perry


Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it. ~Robin Williams, 1986


Golf is hockey at the halt. ~Arthur Marshall, 1985


There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing? ~Peter Andrews

Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly

Golf Quotes

Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly and the players well. ~Art Rosenbaum


The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law. ~H.G. Wells, Bealby, 1915


Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture. ~Winston Churchill


The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. ~Ernest Hemingway


One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball. ~Don Carter


I'm a golfaholic, no question about that. Counseling wouldn't help me. They'd have to put me in prison, and then I'd talk the warden into building a hole or two and teach him how to play. ~Lee Trevino


A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well. ~Author Unknown


Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf. ~Jack Benny




Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward. ~Ken Venturi, on Art Rosenbaum


One thing about golf is you don't know why you play bad and why you play good. ~George Archer


Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~Al Boliska


If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. ~Bob Hope