Golf is golf. You hit the ball, you go find it

Golf Quotes

Golf is golf. You hit the ball, you go find it. Then you hit it again. ~Lon Hinkle


Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing. ~Ben Hogan


One minute you're bleeding. The next minute you're hemorrhaging. The next minute you're painting the Mona Lisa. ~Mac O'Grady, describing a typical round of golf


When you hear someone shout "You da man," if he ain't shouting at Arnold Palmer, then it ain't da man. ~Ron Green, Charlotte Observer

If you wish to hide your character, do not play golf. ~Percey Boomer

Yeah, after each of my downhill putts. ~Homero Blancas, asked if he had any uphill putts


Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle. ~Author Unknown


What's nice about our tour is you can't remember your bad shots. ~Bob Bruce, about the senior tour

To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly. ~Author Unknown


If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~Jack Lemmon


I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. ~Joe E. Lewis


The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. ~Will Rogers


I don't like watching golf on TV. I can't stand whispering. ~David Brenner

Golf is a good walk spoiled

Golf Quotes

Golf is a good walk spoiled. ~Mark Twain

Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's. ~Grantland Rice

If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin

They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson


Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. ~Author Unknown

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. ~Phyllis Diller


Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. ~P.J. O'Rourke

It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification. ~Bruce McCall

Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~Sam Snead

What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive. ~Arnold Palmer


If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson


If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead

Golf is like a love affair

Golf Quotes

Golf is like a love affair. If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. ~Arthur Daley

Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course - the distance between your ears. ~Bobby Jones

Eighteen holes of match or medal play will teach you more about your foe than will 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice

Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad. ~A.A. Milne

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: it's called an eraser. ~Arnold Palmer

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place this world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike

Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it. ~Ted Ray, Golf - My Slice of Life, 1972

Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious. ~P.G. Wodehouse, A Mixed Threesome, 1922

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. ~Paul Gallico

I'm about five inches from being an outstanding golfer. That's the distance my left ear is from my right. ~Ben Crenshaw

The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes. ~Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975